Proton
- Proton
- Status:** Former member of Atomwaffen
- Affiliation:** Definitely **not** the owner of the server
- Known For:** Emotional turmoil between Cookie and Sammy
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- Overview
Proton is a former member of the now-defunct group Atomwaffen (no longer affiliated). Despite the rumors and half-joking accusations thrown around in server banter, Proton insists—*emphatically*—that he is **not** the owner of the server. No one really believes him, but we let him cook.
Once feared, now mostly pitied, Proton has shifted from edge-lord chaos agent to reluctant group mascot. He's widely recognized not for his past affiliations, but for being emotionally whiplashed between Cookie and Sammy—a rivalry that has become the stuff of chatroom legend.
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- The Cookie–Sammy Dilemma
At the heart of Proton’s lore is a tragicomic love triangle:
- **Cookie**: Energetic, erratic, and deeply chaotic. Think gremlin energy with a sprinkle of menace. Cookie represents Proton’s desire for freedom and unpredictable adventure. - **Sammy**: Calm, composed, and a little scary in that quiet way. Sammy is order, comfort, and passive-aggressive Google Docs edits. Sammy represents Proton’s yearning for stability and warm beverages.
Proton’s inability to choose has made him the subject of countless memes, poorly drawn fanart, and at least three dramatic monologues in voice chat.
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- Notable Quotes
> “I'm not the owner, bro. I don't even have mod.” > — Proton, while banning someone
> “Cookie understands my soul. Sammy understands my schedule.” > — Proton, 2am, unprompted
> “It’s not a triangle, it’s a quantum entanglement.” > — Also Proton, trying to explain the situation
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- Trivia
- Was briefly exiled for saying “based” too many times in a row. - Has the server role “Unwilling Triangle Centerpiece.” - Once left the server in protest but came back 15 minutes later because Cookie changed her status to “listening to sad music.” - May or may not be a federally monitored entity. Jury’s out.
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- This page is a work in progress. Much like Proton's emotional stability.*
- Last updated:** April 2025